Jury Duty
Meme It!Jim:Uh, excuse me, can I have everyone's attention for a second? First off, I just want to say that I'm really sorry, I didn't know that my absence last week would have been a burden on any of you, because, though I did have jury duty last week, they did dismiss me early on Monday. And I think you're going to find this pretty hilarious. I kind of, uh, well, maybe took the week off.
Stanley:What?
Jim:Funny? No? Nobody laughing?
Dwight:[laughs] You're screwed! Oh, it's happening. It's really happening.
Stanley:What the hell, Jim? I covered for your bony butt.
Jim:Pam really needed some help with the kids, so, I promise my intentions were good.
Dwight:Your clients. They're all mine.
Darryl:Jim, I got my ass chewed out because one of your orders got messed up. And Andy, you said you drove him to the courthouse.
Andy:Uh, I did, every morning. And if I didn't, then I hope I die.
Dwight:All right, well. Let's get this show on the road, shall we? Allow me to give you a hand. [puts Jim's things in a box] Here we are. So long, clump-mate. I'm going to miss you. Truth be told, I never thought that this was how it was going to end. I always thought that I was going to defeat you somehow. But you've defeated yourself. [laughs]
Andy:Dwight, cut it out. I'm not firing Jim.
Dwight:No, no, no. You said- you said that you were-
Andy:I know what I said. Jim, you're in deep doo-doo. Do you understand? I have one thing to say to you, and I'm going to say it in front of this whole office. Look me in the eye. [gives Jim a limp slap]
Dwight:That's it? This is crap! [dumps the box on Jim's desk and leaves]