The Lover
Meme It!Michael:I have recently taken a lover.
Jim:Well, that's great. Congratulations. Who's the lucky lady?
Michael:Pam's mom.
Jim:What?
Michael:Pam's mom, Helene. Remember from your wedding?
Jim:You're messing with me.
Michael:About what?
Jim:You did not have sex with Pam's mom.
Michael:Oh, big time.
Jim:What kind of car does she drive?
Michael:She drives a green camry.
Michael:And the seats go all the way down. All the way down.
Jim:Oh my God. [Michael bangs the table] Oh my God.
Michael:[laughs] What?
Jim:Okay, never tell Pam, and secondly-
Michael:Okay, good, a pact. A pact. Although I may have to break it tonight when Helene and I tell Pam over dinner. You alright?
Jim:Oh my God.
Toby:[walks in] Hey, Jim.
Jim:Not now, Toby, my God!
Toby:Oh, Jesus!
Michael:Get the hell out of here, idiot.
Toby:What did I do?
Jim:Okay, as far as dinner tonight, cancel that, and please, for both our sakes, never, ever, ever see her again.
Michael:I think you're underestimating Pam. I think more than anything, she wants me to be happy.
Jim:No, not more than anything.
Michael:Okay, I have a good thing with the mom-
Jim:Don't call her 'the mom.'
Michael:She's right on my way home from work.
Jim:Then take a different way home, man!
Michael:I di- alright, I'll take surface streets, its- the last thing in the world I would want to do is upset Pam.
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